As an Aussie, never having seen one except on tv, the size of a kiwi still breaks my noodle. My brain: a fluffy grapefruit, fit comfy into cupped hands Reality:

In such a good mood I’m replying to the opps

every time i go to karaoke i tell myself ok. you are not a good singer. no need to be a hero. and then one and a half beers in im like “i am gonna do Video Games by Lana Del Rey so good i end war”

I can't remember a tech campaign this relentless.

My dad will periodically come by and do a “has my daughter gone insane” inspection and today I failed the inspection because I have an educational tank of crabs in my kitchen.