bring on scotchtober 💪

a cartoon character is sitting in a chair wearing a kilt and a red hat

Alt: Willy the Scottish groundskeeper at Springfield Elementary on The Simpsons. A wily scotsman, ungreased, sits in an interview room and crosses his legs.

and everything will suck just a little bit more

ok so yeah sure my best years may be behind me but on the flip side they weren’t really that good

soothing the savage breast with bag balm

forcing a fireman into the demolition man ice prison just to make the distinction necessary

I sit my apostate ass down and listen. (and subtly inhale)

masterpiece

Oof

fair

read it again