I got this comment back when i was a straight-edge lil twink 😅 like literally before i had ever had a smoke or drink etc.
and then- AND THEN- he saw my keyboards and told me a story about his dad closing his hands in the piano because he was abusive. Some context: it's getting to 84 and swampy and musty (maybe mold on coils?) in here during the day. I've had to make arrangements to keep my kitty safe. cool stuff
Ya'll, I kid you not, two AC techs came today and the older gentlemen of the two was unwilling to do more than say "it's better in here than outside! When I can't sleep at 67° [suicide joke]" and then fuck off while the other tech actually did anything.
i have never torrented 75% of the things i used to make music when i had no money and 100% of the new games i played
The only real motivation for me to continue is that I'm feeling my oats and trauma really wants me to detach from those oats and pretend they ain't exist and capitalism wants me to do shit that i don't give a fuck about. /rant
the internet is just a window into pure horror, too, and that doesn't help- but if we've all basically been conditioned by capitalism to induce adhd (which is real don't get me wrong) who is left to listen to works that took 10 years to make (not to say that time makes art inherently better)
Due to my health and stuff I cannot create at the speed of (seemingly) most folks and it's real hard not to get down about that, but I know the breakneck speeds that markets and content slop driven tech companies have pushed us to is also hella burning folks out
dude the internet the internet, man