It's the closest I'll come to understanding gambling addicts, I think. "This one is gonna be great!" Except all I'm losing is two hours, some brain cells, and the respect of my peers.

god bless tubi, where i can turn on the tv and have a random 2009 louisiana murder mystery starting tommy lee jones, john goodman, and kelly macdonald immediately thrown into my path like somebody drugging a junkyard doberman

Okay but sometimes these are great movies. Usually not, but sometimes.

Who told Trump there were nineties in the 1800s

"It's so bad that women feel like getting pregnant and having children would destroy their lives, so to fix that we're going to gut health care, deregulate childcare, and do nothing to stop climate change. We'll make sure to hurt brown people, though."

Moderators: I have to point out that some Haitians are legally here in America Vance: WHOA WHOA WHOA there, fact checking me is illegal, those cat eating immigrants have phone apps Moderators: (literally turning off Vance's mic)

Q: you plan ethnic cleansing in America with the biggest deportation program ever. So, uh, how would that work? Vance: well obviously you need to start small by just deporting the first million and then we can get to 25million over time, but my mother had an addiction because Kamala let in fentanyl

I don’t think I’d be able to answer Vance at this point with anything but “oh, shut the fuck up,” but that is why I am not a politician

I am almost criminally bad at geography and even *I* know what and where the Congo is.

That is a totally fair point, thank you!