Okay, just FYI: please sleep before you are dead. You don’t need to fuck up your sleep schedule. Sleep is good.

Pretty sure he was just quoting a Warren Zevon song. I hear he likes Zevon

I’ll drink water when I’m dead! …oh

Whew, who can sleep immediately after a pep rally?

You're not my dad, New York Times fact checkers!

Shoot, I wish I'd read this before I died!

Ok, but… endless scrolling?

Good advice. I’m not a doctor, but I don’t think you CAN sleep when you’re dead. I don’t think it’s the same thing at all.

ha ha yes i've been thinking about this thank you

It's all over but for the horrid fact checks, we can mock them in the morning.

In this context, I hear the appeal in a very Minnesota voice: "Ya, you betcha, just be sure to be in bed by 10:30 tomorrow, cause you gotta be up at 6 to catch the early bus on Friday, ok?"