Need to figure out why my dysphoria was so easy to kick yesterday and ride that high every day. 😎
Yesterday sucked so hard. I keep spinning back to that moment in my head and getting angry at myself that I didnt vent my temper at that guy for being a transphobic asshole. He deserved it and I froze.
Torqued my wrist super hard today owowowowowowow
Got so tilted last night when I got the news that my adopted gay was in a crash. Ive lost so many people close to me. I'm so scared of losing more. I end up ostracizing and closing my heart to people I otherwise love if I don't like their risk profile. Gonna revisit these thoughts later sober
I secretly adore my birthday very very much as everyone I love checks in on me and catches me up on what's going on in their lives. Its like a guaranteed day of constant attention from so many people ive gotten to know and love on throughout the years.
Can't properly express how much fun aging has been. I'm so much more powerful at 37 than I ever was in my 20s
Gonna get stoned and log off. If I post more tonight send me to bed.
You'd think I would be numb to the pain of potentially losing people at this point in my life. Yet here we are. Gonna eat my feelings and get stoned.
My brain is absolutely fried right now. The adopted disaster gay we had staying with us isn't even gone for ten days and she just got into a motorcycle accident. I know I can't save people. I know all I can do is help. But for fucks sake I just let her out of my sight. I'm tired of losing people