The mundanity is key - non-sexy framings, and the female character is framed as kind of grumpy, even mildly annoyed. She exists as a person trying to get dressed and not just as an unfathomably sexy pixie

Definitely. Plus even though both comics dedicate the same number of panels to the husband's gaze of his wife, it feels like 9CL is lingering on it in a very fixated way. Centering him as he gawks. Even though the other one shows more of her, it feels more restrained!