Good morning it is the 29 August your challenge for the day is to make it to 10pm without involuntarily generating an opinion about a product designed by Heinz to troll you during the quietest news week. RESIST THE TAKEGood morning it is the 29 August your challenge for the day is to make it to 10pm without involuntarily generating an opinion about a product designed by Heinz to troll you during the quietest news week. RESIST THE TAKE

I'm afraid The Times, the Today Programme and the entire nation of Italy have already failed this challengeI'm afraid The Times, the Today Programme and the entire nation of Italy have already failed this challenge

"My dinner's on fire" (Kenny Everett)

Is that AI?

WOULD BUY

Rhubarb and Custard(s)

Eat while wearing a colour coordinated MCC tie

I'd buy a pair of sneakers with this colorway right now if it was available

Can't top this take anyway.

Heinz panders to lazy Gen Z-ers with the launch of £2 tinned carbonara

Heinz is pandering to lazy Gen Z-ers with the launch of a £2 tinned carbonara, but a horrified Italian restaurant boss says anyone who eats it should be shown the door.

Guaranteed to give you brain worms.

As a teen in the eighties I thought there was nothing finer than a tin of beef ravioli on toast - Buitoni, however, rather than Heinz, for that authentic Italian touch 🤔