When I daydream about my idiayume I never treat myself as a afab bc like it feels so wrong and even though I think he's kinda straight he wouldn't misgender me unless asked to But like not in a chaser way but in a "I accept you" way

I've recently been thinking a lot about how I'd look if I had HRT and I more and more I believe that the only way I'll ever accept myself and maybe date is if I look like a man and date a man who treats me like a man, so I need at least a bi-guy for the role

It's like bo burnham said "if I could be anybody dead or alive, I would wanna be my dad in 1985" If we have the same fucking face why couldn't I have the same fucking sex yk like fuck this shit

I usually only express my gender envy when talking about 2d boys but the envy I feel of real men is like ten times worse bc why could them be born like that and I couldn't

My toxic trait is that I'm gender envy of 80s teen boys (especially the dark edgy ones) Like yeah I would trade my soul to look like JD yk Idk if I'm way to off today but all I wanted is to look more like a man fr

I talk way too much I should kill myself

I should become more incel I think I'll start playing soulslike

Like today was such a stressful day all I want is to watch my fucking movie

I WANNA GO TO THE CINEMA SO BAD AAAAAAAHHHH IF I DON'T WATCH THIS MOVIE TODAY I WILL FUCKING KILL MYSELF