whenever I need to explain to people where my mental illness comes from I just tell them that my parents' front door lock broke when I was about ~14 and they still haven't fixed it, instead opting to always come in via the side door

OMG your parents are the clearest description of the modern Britain median voter

maybe it was a money issue in 2012 but at some point in the intervening decade it just became a refusal to ever use any money to like, call a locksmith with experience on historic doors and pay $500