No-Brainer. @theonion.com

@theonion.com

Mark your calendars, book your flights: Your very own Stan Kelly will be making his fine art debut this fall in Los Angeles. Location: Subliminal Projects 1331 W Sunset Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90026 Exhibition Dates: September 28, 2024 - Nov 2, 2024 Opening Reception: September 28, 2024 6-10 pm

Freedom ain't free. @theonion.com

She's selfishly keeping "mum" ... @theonion.com

Get "Summer-Ready"!* *latest fad SHOP HERE: store.theonion.com/collections/...@theonion.com

Cap and frown. www.theonion.com/gradgitation...@theonion.com

Gradgitation Commencement

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Gen Zzzzzz ... How do they sleep at night? @theonion.com

"May the Fourth"* be with him ... he's gonna need it. *latest fad @theonion.com

Forced to sleep in court ... for sleeping around? @theonion.com