Some Sickos who call themselves "Shagwell Studios" sent me this. What is happening to this world we live in?!? You can see all their twisted creations at shagwellstudios.com

What's YOUR family doing for the holiday weekend? @theonion.com

Celebrate Labor Day by forking over some of that cash you've earned. @theonion.com

Can you imagine what a Mess(iah) that would have been? My latest for @theonion.comtheonion.com/yahweh-or-th...

Yahweh Or The Highway

I'll drink to that! @theonion.com

Chicago: The town so nice, they named it once! But it's still a city full of Sickos, so to help de-stress the Patriotic Americans who were visiting during the recent DNC, I created this coloring page for the new premiere print edition of The Onion:

NEW: For all you nature-lovers. Hike on over to the Onion store now. store.theonion.com/collections/...@theonion.com

'SICKOS Are Calling And I Must Go' T-Shirt

This t-shirt is everything you've dreamed of and more. It feels soft and lightweight, with the right amount of stretch. It's comfortable and flattering for all. • 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Hea...

Joanie is looking down with tears in her eyes. @theonion.com

@theonion.com

As the great Bob Guccione knew well, any publication that's worth its weight in paper and ink will have a sexy centerfold. Clearly, the new incarnation of The Onion in print is off to a promising start. Subscribe now for Kelly cartoons on archival-quality newsprint delivered to your mailbox.