telling my wife to measure my performance in unregretted user minutes

It’s the new Moneyball

Remember to yell "Rapid unscheduled disassembly" when u cum

she's just hoping to start measuring that in minutes finally

I'm on my 1,437th consecutive day of unregretted user minutes with sexual partners

Is a low score good asking for a friend

I thought performance was measured via a tape 📏

you will have a bunch of regretted user minutes after that

I wonder what Grimes’ response was

not the metrics I seek normally

I have never, once, spent an “unregretted minute” on Twitter. I’ve always regretted my posts, comments, likes, and retweets. But, the funny thing about regret, is that it’s better to regret something you have done than something you haven’t done. (Paraphrase orbital sample)