I saw these on packages of shredded cheese and body wash respectively and felt like I was losing my mind

They trademarked it!

Every time I see this sort of thing it reminds me of Calvin's "verbing weirds language" remark

when you stop relying on "experts"

"Family Greatly" makes me think of the airport massage place "Be Relax" and their service "Be Feet"

Such a missed opportunity not to do “Family *Grately*”

this power bar has lofty intentions

These make me clench my teeth. Good thing two of them are dentists, and two are "wellness spas."These make me clench my teeth. Good thing two of them are dentists, and two are "wellness spas."

These have "Engrish" energy