transition is beautiful and fun and the only reason it isn't for so many people is cuz they have to work through a lot of internalised shame and other bs all of which is imposed on them by other people over a very long period of time.

real af

I know my biggest thing is anxiety.

I think the hardest part keeping me away from it is the fear. It shouldn't be like this of course, but openly transitioning is provocative, it's a statement. Every time I'm in a crowd, I just want to hide and not be seen and transitioning scares me because I know I won't be able to do that anymore.

_so much_ internalized shame. Ah well.