At Shipping Of Theseus, we guarantee fast delivery of your package, or an amalgam of your package and other objects that contains enough of your package to still be considered your package from a philosophical standpoint.

Shipping Of Theseus: If It's Most Of What You Ordered, It's All Of What You Ordered™

"this isn't what i ordered" "ah, but it was when it left our warehouse, caveat emptor"

Better than Zeno’s Express Shipping for sure. I filed a complaint with them over failure to deliver but apparently my complaint hasn’t reached them yet

how has this never been written before? this is paperclip levels of rethinking the world

Zeno’s Delivery Service guarantees the delivery of the actual package, no changes. Before it can get there, it must get halfway there and before it can get halfway there, it must get a quarter of the way there. Before traveling a quarter, it must travel one-eighth; before an eighth, one-sixteenth….

I'm sorry - hahaha - I'm gonna have to AXE you to read that again! (🤣)

I think you can use Occam's razor. It's only had three new blades and two new handles.

Can I get the Axe of Theseus?

Some. Reassembly. Required.

I'm still waiting for them to deliver my grandfather's axe