Dean of Science: so what have you been working on Charles Darwin: just got back from a year in the Galapagos Islands where I catalogued all the passerine beak shapes Dean of Science: yeah nah, I'm cutting off your travel budget, that doesn't sound like it'll have much commercial value

This is a subtweet. Lol

Charles Darwin: ok, but what about the abundance of delicious, fearless slow-moving terrapins? Can we do something with those? Dean of Science: I'll get our impact-translation team on it!

TBF one of my former colleagues as spent much of the last few years just sailing around the equator so they can capture ctenophores and sequence them. Miserable life I’m sure.

We'll be moving the marketing team onto the Beagle, and you'll now be sharing an office with an admissions counselor

But why does what you are working on not have APPLIED value