If using the singular “they” to refer to someone in the abstract, it is gender-neutral. And learning someone’s pronouns is for if I’m going to refer to them personally, and not as just someone who’s out there, their utterly gender superfluous to the matter at hand. Sorry but no, you don’t own me.

yeah keep digging in your heels you're really going to convince me

*their gender utterly superfluous to the matter at hand

Just apologise and move on. It's literally not a big deal to correct yourself.