the year is 1979. Gary Numan is walking down the street when he suddenly sees cars. “holy fucking shit, I have an idea,” he exclaimed

My favorite wig

What I learned today: Mozart had great hair.

Showgirls

These new jeans came with instructions not to pull them up by the belt loops. First of all, stay in your lane, pants: I tell you what to do, not the other way around. Second, no

Do the kids still celebrate Rocktober anymore?

Exactly.

Danny Elfman in the hedges outside my front door, waiting patiently for me to run errands so he can score my day. It is finally my turn. Eventually, Elfman comes for us all. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I accept my fate.

I don't want tea to be soothing, I need it to make me sharper, more vengeful.