The last time I ever spoke to my first wife she was yelling at me about becoming a 28 year old divorced person and I was like well so am I and she goes WELL AT LEAST YOU’RE FUNNY and I was like wow hell of a time to give me your first ever compliment lady
all I’m saying is I’ve never seen succotash actually suffering
No one: Not a soul: Me on two edibles: "Moo Deng is the reverse Harambe. Her arrival heralds an end to the dark timeline."
nobody needs to hear from me that they're hot. you all are, ok.
antivenom can be rough
If Biden or Harris suggested the FBI have "one really violent day" so "word got out" about the Trump because "the police can't do their job" everyone in every newsroom would have a collective aneurism and they'd be impeached by the end of the day, and yet if T says it won't even make the front pages
Please stop pressing your Life Alert buttons. We just burned a bunch of toast.
a belated get well soon card that says “I hope you learned your lesson”
the inhumanity