"Here's what's going to happen. You're going to purchase Krusty Burgers and disguise them as your own cooking. You're going to insist they're an old family recipe and you'll call them 'steamed hams,' despite the fact they are obviously grilled. Say it's an Albany expression. Repeat that back to me."

Who is this human basset hound?

An app that gives you your to-do's in Mike's voice and syntax would make a billion dollars and deserve it