This made me laugh out loud.

The "large boulder the size of a small boulder" of names

A former colleague with a Sri Lankan surname married an Irish speaker, whose first name is Meadhbh. At the afters of the wedding, a colleague asked her which surname she would use. She was taking her husband's. "So, you'll have two names people can't spell", my colleague announced.

It is pronounced. I do not know how, but I am assured it is.

Reminds me of the joke "pronounced rarily" about Polish surnames in the book "A Libertarian Walks Into A Bear" by Matthew Hongoltz-Hetling

Irish spelling is perfectly phonetic! Save for sadhbh

I was in a tag rugby team with a Sadhbh. I could have spent the rest of my life trying to work out how to say her name, had she not told me. My daughters are learning Irish in school - the one subject where I am absolutely no help for homework.