So can we confirm that being a pet owner is just a completely random but neverending lifetime of hypervigilance for Unauthorized Munching Noises from an unusual location or of an illicit timbre or duration

Me: What’s in your mouth, it’s toilet paper isn’t it Puppy: (mouth full of bog roll) so?

And hacking... hacking sounds.

My cat figured out that the weird howling noise he would make when he’s about to throw up gets instant attention from me, so now he just makes that noise any time he wants attention (all the time).

My two young cats don't do much Unauthorized Munching, but we get the noises of Suspicious Activity Levels and/or New Things Being Flung About. Both of which require the ritual incantation, "That sounds naughty, stop that!" To, of course, zero effect.

We also become nimble and light on our feet from avoiding crushing the tail of our cat.

May I submit for consideration The Muffled Sound of Illicit Scratching

Today I found a mysterious bloody bone attached to fur and some kind of ear. Turned out it was a piece of baby rabbit skull with the ear still attached. Don't know which of the 4 cats did it, but I have a good guess.

There was a Suspicious Noise last night so suspicious that the 2nd cat and I both immediately snapped our heads that way and then went to check it out. 1st cat had knocked something off of course, thankfully nothing broke.

I saw someone say on here recently that having a pet is wild because there's this creature having wacky adventures in your house while you're just living your life. Which, if that isn't the God's honest truth...

Or worse...suspicious silence.