this poem contains several of the worst sentences i've ever written

there’s a girl working at my favorite diner who i swear to god has the exact appearance and vibe of an irl wendy from gravity falls and she is really doing something to me good lord

this probably looked really nice like a week or two ago

that episode of voyager where she let down her hair really did something for me as a kid

the quintessential american pastime might be forcing yourself to do things that happy people do spontaneously

every picture or video of an animal is pretty much universally good, like it's really hard to go wrong with those. the fact that the same isn't true of humans points at some things that i think are very sad

any of y'all exactly the right age to remember STREET SHARKS

the worst curse i can imagine inflicting on someone is deluding them about what love is, waiting for them to fall in what they think is love, get married, raise a family, and then fifteen years later cursing them to actually fall in love for the first time with someone else

when jorge luis borges was 19 his father arranged for him to lose his virginity to a prostitute. he apparently found the experience so scarring that he was unable to have sex for the rest of his life

what's the dumbest thing you've ever done to impress someone you were into i once jumped into the basin of a waterfall from 10 feet up b/c a girl asked me if i was joining her in the water and i didn't know how to swim and almost drowned