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A real human (Hu/Man)
@realmatt.bsky.social
Not secretly a raccoon pretending to be a human. Totally real person who drives cars and lives under back yard decks, like all of you.
1 followers2 following14 posts
ARrealmatt.bsky.social

No comment, but don’t cross us…them…don’t cross them. Raccoons. Not me as a human.

Gang of raccoons ‘attack’ journalists working at White House
Gang of raccoons ‘attack’ journalists working at White House

Furry pests grab photographer and reporter’s clothes as they work

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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

Join us as we rate which of these people has the best plan to kill Superman once and for all.

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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

Facts: Albert Einstein fed hot dogs do raccoons every day of his life. I don’t know about you, but I am driving my automobile to the local meat shop to buy hotdogs now. You should do the same.

Watch a Canadian Man Hand Feed Hot Dogs to 25 Wild Raccoons
Watch a Canadian Man Hand Feed Hot Dogs to 25 Wild Raccoons

James Blackwood calls himself "The Raccoon Whisperer" for a reason. Check out this video of him feeding hungry raccoons hot dogs and cookies.

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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

This was served at my wedding

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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

NFTs are to the world what I am to my parents, friends, loved ones, and basically anyone who talks to me for > 2 seconds.

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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

The secret to acting? It’s leaving your trash lids open all night. -successful actor and teenage heart throb Oliver Platt

Famous celebrity Oliver platt
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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

I’ve recently learned these things are not food and should not be eaten. Important for all humans like us to know before we drive our trucks to the furniture stores.

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ARrealmatt.bsky.social

I must have a setting enabled where all my posts get 0 likes…I’ll just search the settings and not go cry in the dark

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Profile banner
AR
A real human (Hu/Man)
@realmatt.bsky.social
Not secretly a raccoon pretending to be a human. Totally real person who drives cars and lives under back yard decks, like all of you.
1 followers2 following14 posts