We need to get over the idea that only men can be abusive. Women can too, and it's not misogyny to say it. Literally anyone can be an abuser, and abusers rarely act abusive in public or in front of their friends. There's a reason we have the phrase "behind closed doors" Believe victims!

Your best friend, your mutual, your sibling, your favorite author, your favorite actor, your favorite podcaster or thought leader or the friend of a friend you repost all the time could be an abuser. The nicest person at your favorite pub could be one. Until the victims come out you won't know.