I still like my bit where I called this Apes in Pools Day and posted pics of monkeys taking a swim.

happy 𝗱𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 day

Bro why are Jeeps so angry now are they okay

Normal people: "I need to water my plants." Me, an intellectual: "I wet my plants."

I'm just here on the Internet

It's really sad when you have two Superbowl teams and the mascots can't bone.

How many wasabi peas can you eat in one bite

I heard you needed more lion in your life