"We ran some tests and discovered that the senator’s neural pathways short-circuited when he pictured an African American who wasn’t actively in pain or otherwise being violently oppressed."

Doctors Confirm McConnell Had A Stroke After Imagining A Happy Black Person

WASHINGTON—Having determined the cause of an episode in which the minority leader froze midway through remarks to the press and then remained silent for 19 seconds, doctors confirmed Thursday that S...

True story:

I feel like yall got radicalised along the way somewhere. Nice.

😂😂

I'm giggling way too hard rn

Genius.

The Onion does not miss

This picture is a good example of why I think Senator Thune is a terminator. Just look at him. Total terminator vibes here.

Until his office confirms what happened, we don't know this is satire.

lmao