On my walk today I found a millennia-old turtle who was petrified by an ancient serpent. Some say one day he will wake again
when trump had the election fraud hotline thing after the election i called probably 100 times but 4 or 5 times i called and put on this old country boy accent and did this long preamble about how i went to the polling place that ended with me telling them i saw a dog standing up like a man voting
Los Pollos Hermanos unironically one of the fictional restaurants I'm so sad doesn't exist irl. The food looks so fucking appetizing. The spice curly fries???? Hello???????
my special interest is buying a little snack and a cute drink at the shoppie before getting on a train
gentle reminder: it’s ok to let go of fast food sauce packets in the fridge from 2019
(when you slide the whole pizza box in the fridge) those are load-bearing seltzers