I would celebrate International Women’s Day but I’m not married so I don’t have a picture with my bridesmaids to post

Me in therapy: “Blink twice if other clients are going through the same thing”

When my face looks “meh” but my hair looks great, the hair is like a gift card that I can use to supplement my face card at checkout

I just coined a new phrase: “I know it like the bottom of my foot” for when you know something fairly well but not as well as the back of your hand

It’s that time of year when whatever jacket you choose to wear, you’re wrong

When Olivia Rodrigo said “I met a guy in the summer and I left him in the spring”? Ok, no need to brag about your long and successful relationship

Ever since I saw the words “Enriched Macaroni Product” on a box of spaghetti I’ve been spiraling about the true meaning of the word “macaroni”

I could teach a class on putting together a Girl Dinner that is actually enough food

You’re in his DMs, I’m frantically searching through all my open tabs to try and enter my verification code in time. We are not the same

“Don’t kill house centipedes because they eat other bugs.” What is this, the trolley problem?