Fuck off.
maybe if something that is clearly a joke doesn't resonate with you that means it isn't FOR you and you can just ignore it.
kids today don't understand the appeal of You've Got Mail because they've never lived in a world where receiving an email doesn't make you want to slit your wrists
the use of novel here is great bc you could mean novel dicks as in new dicks that you have never sucked before (and that perhaps have interesting - novel - shapes), or paper dicks from a pop up novel (unlikely) or it could be metaphorical & you could mean "write overly flattering reviews of novels"
Humanity really went wrong when we gave up on the vengeful and bloody old gods who mediated our sense of alienation from the universe
"Lol I didn't see this til now" - guy who definitely saw this before now
If I had a time machine I would keep going back to the 1800s and filing patents for Edison's inventions an hour before he arrived at the patent office.
I tried calling my dad on Thursday and he texted that he'd call me back and then he didn't for two days so I texted him asking if everything was okay because I haven't heard from him and he texted back "oh and why is that?" like it's my fault we haven't spoken
International Women's Day is almost over. I hope all you ladies got your one free kill in before the deadline.