Jamming out to Tenacious D and I started headbanging…y’all that shit hits different when you’re 40 as opposed to 20

So I busted two tourists urinating on the building where I work. Y’all, we want you to enjoy our beautiful city. But if you’re not housebroken, stay at the fucking hotel.

MAMA WANTS THAT MUGSHOT

“I always wondered why blessings wore disguises. If I were a blessing I’d run around naked.” -Sophia Petrillo

I can’t with this…gonna have a good shower-cry now

Does anyone else’s job just make them sad

I’m so happy for Cillian Murphy. He’s finally getting his due. Plus he seems like such a non-bullshit kinda guy and I love those kinds of people.

My therapist, before and after our first session: