All of this. And a few times I've clearly explained it to people they've immediately outright rejected what I've just explained and declared "Don't worry about it, ask to come over!". It's so demoralising when someone pretends my sincere words are just performative politeness. I'm so fucking tired.

I know I’m guilty of this towards you, shall try and be better at inviting you as I genuinely love and adore your company.

I could write a book on this from my past… 🙃.

I feel like a burden to ask... *Shrug* so I dont

It's very exhausting when you explain "Hey, this is how it works in my brain" and they just go "Okay, we'll completely ignore that so we can get mad at you."

i have done what they said before too, and had the whisper network go on about how i invited myself and made it awkward. I NEED explicit permission otherwise, i do not assume im wanted

Rejection is hard. Past experience is difficult to overcome. And if I did ask if I could come, I would then feel like they only said "yes" to be polite

How about getting invited by one person, be given an admission band, only to get shut out by their mate because you aren't sexy enough. Not being expressly invited sucks. Getting dumped is a grudge that will be held until that person is trapped in a burning car, and I watch them beg. Then burn.

This. A thousand times over, ALL of this.

"Ask to come over!" Ma'am. That, to me, is very rude.

This instantly puts my thoughts into words