Sipping a J2O in a throbbing nightclub, refusing to dance, one eye on the cloakroom, regaling people I’ve just met with how fresh I’ll feel in the morning, the only thing I’m drunk on is power.

I did a wedding sober last week and they didn't have anything non-alcoholic at the free drinks reception after. I was so close to mentioning it to someone and had to stop myself cause I couldn't be that guy, I couldn't be THAT sober