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Dave Levitan
@davelevitan.bsky.social
Deputy editor, Splinter, covering climate and more. Previous: The Messenger/Grid, bylines all over before that. Author: NOT A SCIENTIST: How politicians mistake, misrepresent, and utterly mangle science (2017, WW Norton). Davelevitan{at}gmail.com
7.1k followers658 following5.4k posts
DLdavelevitan.bsky.social

Remember: www.splinter.com/do-not-wash-...

At a certain point in the process of washing your Cybertruck, it will pose a series of riddles. Failure to answer any of these correctly will lead your Cybertruck to shrink by 14 percent.
Do not wash your Cybertruck on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays, or Sundays, if it is an odd month of the year. Do not wash in even months at all. The moon must be a waning gibbous moon. Jupiter and Mars must be visible in the sky — if it were dark enough to see them, which, as has been discussed, it should not be. Failure to heed timing restrictions will result in the Cybertruck’s battery starting a multi-level marketing company involving essential oils.
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overtone42.bsky.social

That’s funny

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DL
Dave Levitan
@davelevitan.bsky.social
Deputy editor, Splinter, covering climate and more. Previous: The Messenger/Grid, bylines all over before that. Author: NOT A SCIENTIST: How politicians mistake, misrepresent, and utterly mangle science (2017, WW Norton). Davelevitan{at}gmail.com
7.1k followers658 following5.4k posts
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