if I could be anything I would be asleep

today my bra just kinda felt like knives so I suggested we lose our bras and do casual boobs Friday at work and no one responded

If you’re digesting them do they still come out in golf ball form

my binary toddler Saffron is presently grounded as a logical consequence for making our farmer’s market outing completely ungrammable due to a probiotic soda incident I don’t even want to get into

People say I’ve changed since getting 32 likes … I say they’re just jealous

I think I don’t spend enough time on the app so that’s what I get but thank you I appreciate the sentiment

while you studied the blade, I was yapping while you mastered the block chain, I just yapped away while you cultivated inner strength, you guessed it, I was getting my yap on

lately time has been whispering to me, now now now. it makes a point

And I will never look at this without feeling deeply satisfied with my work 😈

I will never forgive u for this @housefeminist.bsky.social