why does he look like you just walked in on him arguing in a hentai forum

Black-and-white photo Somehow still looks sweaty

“What smells like shit? Oh, it’s me.”

The Civil War re-enactment dork that only ever cosplays one side...

hair chewed by a pet

Because the photographer just walked in on him arguing in a hentai forum.

Does look like a toddler who shit himself

Looks like there’s something moist in his pants

You know, when your barber gives you a haircut guaranteed to make you always look like you’re currently on morning 4 of a multi-substance bender? Your barber probably hates you. And maybe it’s time to consider your life choices. JV.

“… just five minutes”

he reminds me of a way less interesting Jackie Daytona