In my childhood life, I was abused so severely that police came by my home twice. One was because the neighbors hears us screaming and crying in fear and pain. My dad & my grandparents made up some excuse to say they were just disciplining their kids. But no, this wasn't the case. (1/2)

I have been ripped from any major goals in life for the past 11 years. Every goals, dreams, hopes & dreams. Now I just want to survive and avoid anything that could hurt me & try to cry less.. i feel no hope, keep everything and anything to myself... i only use this account as my journal..

I made choices I'm not proud of. Emotional, impulsive, ragged, tired... but I choose my path and I have to keep pushing, work harder...please never expect or rely on your partner for everythjng. Take care of yourself, make your own income for sanity sake.

The people who hate you, will never find it enough how much they want you to suffer. They wish for you to suffer for the rest of your life, forgetting you're just like them, human. We all want to live our lives, be happy. Grudge is toxic, move on and focus on your life. Their battles isn't yours.

Getting pullled. I didn't respond. I was being ask this and that, when I told her I had trauma for being used by others in the past. Tricked to giving them money.. I cant handle socializing anymore.. i dont trust anybody..

(2/2) they told me her mom was "starving". I told her I couldn't help her. She had never asked me for help setting up her Kofi, she just started asking questions how to do this and that without even giving me a warning.. then at some point she asked me to be a voice on her stream cuz her teeth was-

Fighting depression do often, I tried to avoid people cuz I dont wanna get hurt.. but when I socialize with an old friend, I got mentally destroyed again cuz they try to use me to help themselves. How? She try to "vent" that she needed money to buy groceries when they had 170 dollars, and (1/2)

(2/2) I'll be there for them. Work with them, heal them, give them a happiness they deserve, even if they don't think they deserve it. Struggles are a part of life, nothing will simply be easy nor stress free. But I grew, I learn, I tread my path carefully from every mistake & pain I experience.

I told myself that I could live a happy life without struggle. That I *needed* that life. But I saw someone that was falling. Deeper and deeper, alone, sad, angry at the world. I knew them for years. It didn't sit right with me to watch them fall. So as a final act (1/2)

(2/2) themselves, meaning set up some emergency goal and be honest/transparent where the donations are going. I'm sick of helping others cuz I have trust issues. I'm too mentally burnt out to take on other people's problems, so I have gone radio silent & kept socializing to a minimum.