Doctor: Your BMI is high Me: I'm fat because I like marijuana and snacking at 2 am

the world is full of horrors. but there is always ice cream while lying in bed

I cannot un-imagine this now 😏

You mean PHAT, cause yeah you are.

Hahahahahaha ♥️

Tell your doctor, as you're rolling a joint, that BMI is widely considered a terrible gauge of someone's actual health. Then pass me the Doritos.

YOU: yeah well, I’m just BMI self DOCTOR: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA BEING MYSELF I GET IT look seriously

tell your doctor that BMI is so yesterday. these days it all about BRI !

Dr: that won't do *prescribes the Mary Devil's Lettuce and a 3 month subscription to Netflix and Doordash* Dr: Now make sure to smoke at least a bowl a day and hydrate o/

...and in my case, add craft beer.

🤣🤣