this there’s a spicy flavor of shame for not being able to be effortlessly self-sufficient in a glossy-looking way and it tends to get attached to the kind of work women are supposed to be good at when you see people who look like they’re doing it really well, look for the invisible employees

there's always a parentified child or a silently screaming household assistant of some kind

As Mr Rogers said in a very different context, look for the helpers?

every time someone writes one of those articles about tradwives and showcases a lil tiktok of them making gummy bears from scratch bc of Big Pharma or w/e I'm always calculating how many cleaners & nannies are required. I can see the light coming through that window, no way this is post-kid-bedtime