Can you do it on memory foam?

God damn can we not strike out

Let’s go Royals

Not to hype myself up, but I make a pretty mean hamburger helper

some people wonder if i can possibly be this self-centered and to those people i say do you think i should get bangs

Have my children (platonically)

when a dolphin tries to have sex at a 90 degree angle to their mate, that's called porpindickular

ME: What's...what's it called when people do a floaty? Like with the spirits and the horrors and they do a floaty? HIM: Levitating? ME: YES! Floatytating!

I haven’t focused on anything since November of 21

I don't want to be "in the moment." I want to be in a different, better moment