I should try to record today, but I'm so fucking tired and my throat feels weirdly scratchy for some reason. I just don't really feel like doing much of anything right now
So tired today. That's why there wasn't a stream. Nothing new, obviously, but I should've posted earlier. Sorry
Okay, so Dark Messiah kept crashing for some reason, so now she's playing Dark Souls
Special stream today! My girlfriend is here and I'm making her play Dark Messiah of Might & Magic! Come watch! www.twitch.tv/mixtercasual
I'm a trans gal with a plethora of mental illnesses playing a variety of video games and trying to make a living
I made the mistake of looking at my analytics and now I want to disappear into the sea. I don't even like the sea
Had to wake up way too damn early today, but once I got back home I crashed and took a ~2 hour nap. Now I almost actually feel like a person! Time to edit!
Anyway, sorry y'all. I'm not feeling up to streaming today. Should be back with normal streams after today, but I think I need a day of.... something
I dunno. Like all things I do, there's no real point to this thread. Like I said, I'm gonna keep doing what I do. Just, god, I'm so tired of sitting in an empty room talking to myself, knowing that no one is hearing what I'm saying and I could just as easily not do it
But god damn it's becoming harder and harder to actually stream. It's becoming harder and harder to motivate myself to record new episodes that I know not a single person will actually watch. Lately I've come so so close missing episodes and I don't know that I even really care anymore
And the thing is, even if I were to quit, give up, pack it in, I don't know what I would do. I'm disabled and can't work, and I don't want to just spend all my hours mindlessly playing the same games and jerking off. I need something to do, to fill my hours, and this is it. So I keep going