the mums are mummening

Neighbor kid asked if I wanted a dead tarantula from his yard, I guess that's my jenny from the block

‘That’s not what I meant’ will be on my tombstone…

(hearing about the headless horseman) oh that’s probably why he’s so mad

my friend is staying with me for a few days and I’m making her administer my meds like One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

I can’t breakdance but I can breakup and breakdown

😄♥️😄♥️😄♥️🍔🌮😋💥🌧

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

as a little treat...it'd be fucking nice if something went my way for a change

Honey, I shrunk your optimistic outlook on the world.