Arwen: Great news dad I'm going to marry my boyfriend who lives outside and doesn't have a job and does a lot of foraging and archery Elrond: uhhhhhh there is a, um, a magical reason you can't do that
I forgot that it's canonical that Gollum has eaten orc meat. That's really fucked up.
Also technically Arwen and Aragorn are cousins.
Let me remember that one for times I become a parent
"Sure, you can have him sweetie, when he's a boss." "A boss of what?" "Everything." "Dad!"
Oh I am SAT for Gretchen lotr posting
Oh god Aragorn is a wook
"He's never brushed his teeth even once!" "Oh..." "I saw him eat a live squirrel "
Elrond: also, your mother and I are moving to Argentina, yes, the day after your wedding. Yes, we're also taking Asfaloth along with all the other horses, you wouldn't want him to get lonely, would you? Anyway, good luck with the whole aging and dying thing. Send us a postcard when it's about time.
in the books he was fine with it "Oh yeah sure you can marry him I sort of raised him so you could do that"