Listen, America is a weird, tacky, frequently bizarre place, but the best of it is like Dolly Parton and puts that shit in service to the world. You do not mess with Dolly. People will come out of the woods and cut you. *I* will come out of the woods and cut you.
Like that time they came for Mr. Rogers. There are some people you don't ever unless they did something. But these article click clowns need to understand we will see the byline.
AND MY AXE
There's a life-sized standee of her in our library and it keeps getting moved, so she jump scares me when I come into work
I never thought they'd die. But now I have hope. This might really be their fatal mistake.
I will come across the border to protect Dolly!
Do they know what love is, what it looks or feels like?
She gives free completely inoffensive books to small children in my county, and probably has a higher net positive rating amongst clueless MAGA twits than just about any other non-MAGA celebrity. Where is the upside to targeting her - they thirst for stories about the people they already hate!
I will take a week off from work, buy some sensible hiking shoes, fly to the US and ask for directions to the woods so that I can come out of them and cut whoever's still around for cuttin's.