Fettuccine alla Keir Starmer has been scrubbed from the menu of a Kentish Town restaurant by irate restaurateur.
Panini UK announce Jonathan Ashworth trading card game to capitalise on the Labour politician's immense popularity.
Popular TV personality Jonathan Ashworth has announced a live show at the 02 Arena, featuring special guest Bubble from Big Brother.
Thousands march outside Downing Street demanding that popular politician and TV personality Jonathan Ashworth receive top government job.
Rosie Duffield is the Don Mclean of British politics. She's had two smash hits - transphobia and monosexism - but seems unable to develop any fresh material.
New biography claims that Sir Keir was born with a disease called lieitis, which renders him unable to lie.
BREAKING Tory and Labour politicians high five beside a sign that reads "MENTAL HEALTH" to raise awareness for people with mental health.
"Well, this is nice, isn't it? Finally some of that 'us' time you've been pestering me for... Yep, just us for a change... Us at the Costa Coffee having some quality time together."
