First day in the lake of fire and everyone's asking what you're in for and you have to say "I spent $3.3m in state money on bibles endorsed by Donald Trump and the 'God Bless The USA' guy in my capacity as a public employee." All the demons rolling their hideous eyes like "look at this dork."

plus the demons get really mad at all the paperwork necessary to create a new circle of hell for thisplus the demons get really mad at all the paperwork necessary to create a new circle of hell for this

I don’t know, doing it so state schools don’t have the budget to feed hungry kids might get him some credit down there

Banished to the “bureaucratic ratfucking” circle of Dante’s inferno, right next to “disabled parking impersonators” and “wage thieves”

"Oh, you are one of those. Giuliani set up daily fire-water aerobics class at 4pm you might like."

You do not want to see 100 compound eyes rolling.

Everyone in Gehenna groans at my shit

Trying to phrase this in a meter that Johnny Cash might sing

Buncha popes buried head first with their feet on fire planning to code red this jackass right after Lights Out

The depths this guy plumbs in order to establish his "own the libs" bona fides to run for governor in two years is truly astounding. A good number of Republicans in this state don't even like him!

going to hell from Oklahoma is a major zipcode and quality of life upgrade, though, so kinda happy for him.