jury duty is a wild concept. whenever the government wants, they can just be like “call off work bestie, we need you to solve a murder 🥰 here’s fifteen dollars.”

Wait, how did you get $15

It's even dumber than that. In Seattle, they pay $10 a day, and if you are collecting unemployment, they deduct that $10 a day from your weekly check.

grand jury is like "okay, will four people out of twelve decide to nullify this crime? and what if we selected those twelve reaaaaaally careeeeefully 🙈"

They don't even give you $15 here.

Wait'll you hear about conscription!

Jury duty most of the time feels like a compulsory trip to an alternate universe DMV where everyone is nicer to you than usual

The one time I did Jury duty it took 2 days to hear a policeman say “I’m pretty sure this was the guy I saw do the crime” and the group’s consensus was the guy looked shifty therefore guilty

My kids are all an age such that they can be alone after school and I’m a SAHM, so actually this would be a money-making proposition for me.

The best part is when you're doing your taxes the next year and the government is like, "remember when we forced you to work for two dollars an hour for six weeks? Yeah, we're gonna need some of that back."

"sleepover but only if my mom said the media is being weird"