"The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese." Stephen Wright

Aioli is just mayonnaise that studied abroad.

It's too much starch!

They say Stage 0 is the best cancer to get but they still want to cut it out of you

"What if codependency could eat your shoes?" -God, creating dogs

Rutherford B Hayes: an example of what the presidency will do to a person, taking him from hottest POTUS to . . . whatever happened there.

Accelerationism so we are all fed up and will tolerate more violence to "restore order"

Or the illusion thereof

This is why it's good for kids to be in day care

On a cruise with a cool couple. He's ex NYPD Organized Crimes unit, and she literally can't tell us what her job was because it was so classified.